So, last night, I took my first pure shot of caffeine…
It was marvelous!
Driving with the kids 14+ hours from NC to CT is always quite the trek. Towards the end, we start to fade and sometimes I lose track of long stretches of road. My wife suggested those 5-hour energy drinks you see at gas stations and rest stops. Why not?
Though it tasted like old lemonade (with a touch of medicine and feet), the stuff did work! We weren’t hyper, but the exhaustion was pushed to the background and we were able to drive alert and functional. Awesome stuff!
Since my 13-round bout with cancer, I have certainly loosened my previous Puritan outlook on drugs.
Morphine was my first experience with “the hard stuff”. When all the kings men put me back together again, I needed something to completely warp reality. God Bless Morphine! I remember focusing on two specific things – my drool, and the guy across the room from me in one of the communal recovery rooms. In my mind, my drool had become a river that weaved its way throughout the hospital, and I had to build my rides and walkways around it (right before going under the knife I played Rollercoaster Tycoon for about 15 hours straight). The alien planet that sprung up around my drool was much like the 3D Pandora from Avatar. I really thought I was changing the world around me, and that perhaps I was a government experiment.
Then, the guy across from me in one of my recovery rooms had fallen or some shit. I think he had a bandage across his face, because that’s what I focused on. My Morphine told me that the man had smashed his face so badly that now he was a cyclops. The doctors had to refashion his face to accommodate his one eye. I just wanted to get a good look at it.
After Morphine was Oxycontin. Oh wait – Oxycontin on top of a “pain patch”. What’s a “pain patch”? Well, it’s just like a nicotine patch, but it’s got painkillers that slowly seep into your shoulder and give you a nice, warm feeling for months on end.
Now, all of that is over and I’m healthy… no need for the good stuff anymore. I guess it’s good, as I do have a career and family relying on me. I can’t exactly go back to drool-world or layered meds world these days. But, I do sometimes wonder why I was such a prude when I was a kid. I sure missed out on some great fun!